I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
