Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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