awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
