My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
