glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
MIDGETS
????
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
