i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
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