Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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