that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
