Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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