its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
She needs sedatives and a leash
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
