You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
