but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize