she looked like the bat from fern gully.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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