I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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