ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
