What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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