Kiss
Puke
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
