she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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