sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
