Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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