I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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