We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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