her vagine was all disorganized.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
