it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
