yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Randomize
