I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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