Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
