But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
