This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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