Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
