I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize