When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Verdict: uncircumcised.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
