Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize
