my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
