this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Randomize
