so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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