im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
