That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
In America we eat man semen.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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