You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
