bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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