Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
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That was an excessively violent trivia night
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
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Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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