Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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