I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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