Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
