Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
