I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
