Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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