I want to walk on stilts...naked
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
