I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
