then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize