Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
no more duck duck goose at the bar
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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