That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
your like the ambassador to my penis.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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