Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
